Thursday, August 1, 2013








I had read something the other day that I think I will live by..It was about an event in someone's life and the very wise person who answered them told them that the things you do in your life are stepping stones the way to get to your next goal and future goals.  Makes you feel better for instance if you have a low paying, dead end job if you think of it as a stepping stone you have hope for the future, however if you have the same job and get consumed about how it is the way you are going to live the rest of your life or a portion of it you can get depressed  with no hope in site.  The stepping stones theory helps you to make more goals and stepping stones to your brighter future.  For me going to work every day and thinking this is all there is for me would be very depressing, so I think to myself this is a stepping stone to get to the other places in life I need to be.  Like getting across the creek, I am not going to stand on just one stone but as I used each one to cross  I become closer to where I want to be.  Each experience in life gets us one step closer to where we need to be. To see the text,you might have to hi light it then read.

 Stepping Stones

Crossing the River of Life One Stone at a Time

River of lifeToday we have another winter weather advisory. Didn’t someone tell Mother Nature spring is officially three days away. Yes, I want the snow to disappear and green grass to sprout with daffodils and irises in the flowerbed. Somewhere in my annoyance about the pending weather, I found myself wishing for summer days as a child when my brother and I would play in the creeks, catching frogs and crayfish. We spent hours challenging each other to cross the creek without falling in. Life is like that, we take each stepping stone learning life lessons and sometimes fall in and get wet. Just like the game, the object of life is to cross the river safely, learning along the way.
The stepping stones in the river teach us different lessons. The small stones represent life events. These stones peek out just above the surface. We will get our feet wet, but these events propel us forward the next stone. Small stones give us good memories like transitions periods of college to adulthood or single to married life and the beginning years of parenting. Life is trial and error sometimes.
Jagged rock teach us life lessons. Some jagged rocks we step on are more painful than others. The lessons mature us and give us wisdom. Jagged rocks of life are the reality that life is hard, but we do not have to stay there. The great thing about the river of life is that there is always another rock to step on,we simply have to take the next step.
Jumping from the small rocks and jagged rocks are easy. Smooth rocks in this river represent safe havens, when life is going great and there is respite from small and jagged rocks. The smooth rock is inviting, and welcomed. But you must beware of smooth rocks, they can be deceivingly slippery. Slip off of this rock can splash you into another life changing event. Pick yourself up out of the river and dry off. Life situations can be deceiving sometimes.
Life is full of ups and downs, but there are also good times. Safe comfortable periods that allow you to heal, grow and get ready to move forward. These times are represented by boulders. Like the rushing water in the river, life flows around you. Life is good standing on the large stable boulders. Unfortunately, these resting spots are just that. Small periods of rest. You must keep moving to another rock in order to complete your journey.
The journey of life is all about learning from each step you make. Some steps are easy, while others give you a lifetime of wisdom. Yet the journey is all about moving forward and never stop discovering life’s possibilities. Life is not as simple as that childhood game I once played, but I am learning just as much now as I did when I was a kid. Keep moving forward. Safe travels my friends.
 
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Posted by  on March 18, 2013 in Uncategorized
 

Turn Your Stumbling Blocks into Stepping Stones!

8 powerful steps to take during difficult times

Helen Keller once wrote: “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.” As we navigate through challenging times toward a better future, it’s useful to visit some tried and true ideas regarding life hardiness and resiliency. This is not meant to be an exhaustive list, but rather a reminder of some existential ideas we sometimes set aside as we tend to the hectic details of daily life. If you find this article helpful, share it with those whom you care about who are in need. There's power in good will reverberated.
1.    The Power of Perspective
Life is not always easy. We all know that. How we choose the way we think, feel, and act in relation to life’s challenges can often make the difference between hope versus despair, optimism versus frustration, and victory versus defeat. With every challenging situation we encounter, ask questions such as “What is the lesson here?” “How can I learn from this experience?” “What is most important now?” and “If I think outside the box, what are some better answers?” The higher the quality of questions we ask, the better the quality of answers we will receive. By asking constructive questions based on learning and priorities, we can gain the proper perspective to help us tackle the situation at hand. 
“I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward.” 
- Thomas A. Edison
2.    Focus on the Sky not the Mud
We should learn from the past, but not be stuck in it. Sometimes life circumstances and personal setbacks can haunt and prevent us from seeing our true potential and recognizing new opportunities. What has already happened we cannot change, but what is yet to happen we can shape and influence. At times the first step is simply to break from the past and declare that it is you, not your history, who’s in charge. Ask empowering questions such as “What matters to me now?” “How can I make a difference in this situation?” and “What’s the next step for my best interest and well-being?” Every moment we’re alive we can make new choices that help us move on and step toward a better future. If we pay attention to only mud on the ground after a storm, we won’t notice that the sky above us has already cleared. Goethe reminds us: “Nothing is worth more than this day.” Don’t focus on the mud. Make better choices today and move on.
For more information on how to eliminate your negative emotions and develop a positive attitude, see my article Five Keys to Enhancing Your Emotional Intelligence.
3.    Ask the Right Individuals
In life we sometimes may feel like we’re walking alone, but we don’t have to be as long as we’re honest with ourselves, and ask for help when needed. You can find strength and support through a “board of advisors” you create. These are your “go-to” people when you’re in need of sound advice, a new perspective, a certain expertise, or simply an empathetic ear. Members of the board can include individuals you know whose opinions you respect and character you trust. Your personal B.O.A. can also include your role models from past and present, historical or fictional. Ask, for example: “What would (role model A) say about my situation?” or “What would (role model B) do if she were in my shoes?” Asking for help is not the same as complaining. Habitual complainers dwell on what’s wrong. Successful people assume responsibility for finding the support they need to solve the problem.
For tips on strengthening relationships, see my articles 7 Keys to Long-Term Relationship Success, and Poor Communicators: Stop Harm & Save Relationships.
“Normal people have problems. The smart ones get help.” 
- Daniel Amen
4.    Thrive on Your Strengths While Exploring Your True Potential
We each have certain dispositions in which we naturally excel. Some of us are great with people, others are handy with tools, yet others thrive on information. A mismatch between what you’re naturally good at and your work in life is wasted potential. There are a myriad of assessment tools available that can help you determine your natural strengths, as well as your areas of greatest potential. For more information regarding this point, see my article Follow Your Bliss - Discover Your True Calling in Life.
“When you follow your bliss… doors will open where you would not have thought there would be doors, and where there wouldn't be a door for anyone else.”
- Joseph Campbell
5.    Keep Having Fun 
Van Wilder from the movie with the same name said: “You shouldn’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out alive.” No matter how difficult the circumstances, resolve to keep the fun and enjoyment in your life. Make a point to take a “mini-vacation” everyday; be it walking in the park, exercising, hugging a loved one, or taking a nice, hot bath. The more challenging and stressful life is, the more important it is to take good care of yourself so you can relax your body, ease your mind, and rejuvenate your spirit. After recharging your batteries, you may see the same situation in a different, more positive light.
6.    Keep Your Options Open
There are many paths to opportunity, success, and happiness. We can begin by asking ourselves what true success and happiness means and looks like to us, and let our answers show the way. When one path seems to be at a dead end, look another way and see what new openings may be waiting just around the corner. Options can come from consulting the aforementioned board of advisors, thinking outside the box, daring to dream, doing something different, or simply letting go of a habit or condition that has clearly outlived its usefulness. We’re never stuck unless we have blinders on. Keep your options open.
“We must dare to think 'unthinkable' thoughts. We must learn to explore all the options and possibilities that confront us in a complex and rapidly changing world.”
- James W. Fulbright
7.    Keep the Faith
There are many ways to keep your faith alive: Faith in yourself, faith in your place in this world, and faith in answers the Universe has in store for you. Go to places and engage in activities that give you the greatest feeling of inner peace. When you give yourself this gift on a regular basis, what psychologists call the Higher Self emerges, as insights, inspiration, and a sense of deep knowing spring forth from the depth of your soul.
The following quote by Anne Frank is just one example: “The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely, or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature, and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature.”

As you immerse yourself in peace, ask: “What if what I’m going through is a blessing in disguise? What greater meaning exists for me now?” Put forth these and any other constructive questions that come straight from your heart. Don’t try to figure out the answers during these moments, but rather “empty your mind” and let the solutions come to you. The answers may come at that moment or later: sometimes when the time is right; sometimes when you least expect them. All you have to do is hold the questions and pay attention.
Keep the faith. Find your peace within, and the answers will come!
8.    Resolve to Never, Ever Give Up
I once heard a courageous person say that there are no losers in life, except for those who give up on themselves. If you’re still alive and breathing, your purpose in this life time is not yet fulfilled. The great adventure is in discovering what that purpose is, and to live it until your last breath. If you’re reading this article, you’re probably being pulled by an inner calling to do more. That calling is your adventure waiting to happen. What are you waiting for? And what are you willing to do now?
“Abraham Lincoln lost eight elections, failed twice in business and suffered a nervous breakdown before he became the president of the United States.” 
- Wall Street Journal
“If you don’t have the capacity to change yourself and your own attitudes, then nothing around you can be changed.” 
- Anwar Sadat
“The marvelous richness of human experience would lose something of rewarding joy if there were no limitations to overcome. The hilltop hour would not be half so wonderful if there were no dark valleys to traverse.” 
- Helen Keller
As mentioned at the beginning, if you find this article helpful, please share it with those whom you care about that are in need. There's power in good will reverberated!
For more on personal and professional success, download freeexcerpts of my publications: "Communication Success with Four Personality Types," "How to Communicate Effectively and Handle Difficult People," "The 7 Keys to Life Success," "Wealth Building Attitudes, Values, and Habits," and "Branding Your Career Like Steve Jobs — Seven Essential Lessons in Work Success."
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Preston Ni, M.S.B.A. is available as a presenter, workshop facilitator, and private coach. For more information, write tocommsuccess@nipreston.com, or visit www.nipreston.com.
© 2012 by Preston C. Ni. All rights reserved worldwide.

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